the cc 2009 retrospective

of course this is a looking-back-at-2009 list. what else could be more... trite? hehehe

this year was all about family, particularly parents. on top of work, of teaching, of extra-curricular activities, i completed two major projects for my parents: the celebration of their marital vows 50 years after, and the construction of their new house. of course, none of these two projects wouldnt have been completed without the support of cc siblings. but these were major stressors in my life. the million and one details i had to be on top of to make sure things go as close to plan as possible. then the million and one things that turn out differently, testing your patience, creativity and resourcefulness and grace under pressure.

another accomplishment was the reconstruction of the cc physique. lost a lot of the fat for the first time in years. partly stress, partly perserverance: south beach diet, fitness boxing on top of regular sessions with trainor. the dedication paid off, but not without cost.

i was hospitalized, my first in 10years. typhoid fever or dengue, nothing was conclusive. but i had to stay in the hospital for one week. despite the amenities of the suite, i couldnt f**kng sleep on the hospital bed. then there were the routine blood tests for platelet count (every 12 hours) my poor veins.

i quickly browsed the posts of 2009 and saw the quiet desperation that welled up inside of me. of course, sex and its many permutations were still part of it. that desperation led to the fall of cc, under a talented mr ripley.

towards the end of the year, the burden of house construction began to take its toll on resources. and on top of that, the many little problems associated with new houses: drainage blocked here. leaking hose there. dirt and debris everywhere. the stresses dont seem to end.

funny though. calendar year ends. as if it puts a period to all of these events, situations and circumstances. but it really is just another day. and much as i would like to think all those problems would leave with 2009, they won't.

but what could go and leave with 2009 is the attitude. it's really the only one that i could change anyway.

on another note, i read posts from two bloggers i personally know that struck me for their similarity: they both acknowledged their brief encounter with cc in similar ways. "meeting him made me realize i was ready to love again." "thank you for waking my sleeping heart" and as much as i am flattered by the mentions, i am also left thinking that cc is a defibrillator, a cardiac jumpstarter. perhaps i might as well evolve into a pacemaker. lol.

2009 ended well. discourse with an intelligent, passionate youth within various settings: a carinderia, starbucks, the condo, the roof deck of the new house, the ride home in sexyback.

then it was celebration time on the roof deck with the help. amazing view of both ortigas and makati fireworks. we had our own displays, fountain-types. and the cloudless night with the most beautiful full moon ever.

i kept on shouting Thank You, Lord. Thank You.