im hanging out right now at the food court of one of the buildings inside the Univertsity of Toronto campus, waiting for a friend to finish his chores for the day.
this is one trip that almost never happened. and only had less than a month of advance notice. a leap of faith, actually. the opportunity to take this trip came just last month, as i was preparing for the trip to cape town. i hesitated, almost declined even then. because i felt i was still recovering from my trip by then. nevertheless, i went through the motions and inwardly, left it all up to God. Bahala na. if He didnt want me to go, circumstances will happen to prevent it.
it was quite a long shot, i only had barely two weeks to get my visa processed. then, when it was finally processed, it seemed like the wrong one. a workers visa instead of a visitors visa. we might have problems at the immigration of the port of entry in toronto. and that was like three days to the time i was set to depart. i couldnt decide. i didnt know if i wanted to go through the uncertainty, not knowing if the my visa might get questioned or revoked. i didnt know if i wanted to sit in an airplane for 12 hours, go through two layovers. am i still feeling up to it? and for a trip that would only last 5 days.
i ws asking for a sign. i even tweeted that request. and i got really funny answers from twitfriends (nitwits? hehe) then one of them just retweeted 'like trying to fly an airplane', about christian missionaries being very serendipitous, and just trusting God to provide. the title itself was some kind of ninuninuninu "airplane", followed by the content itself, of just believing. that made me decide to go for it and just Trust that this is what He wants, and that nothing untoward would happen.
and now, im here. ive actually endured that 12 hour trip from nagoya to detroit, managing to sleep through some of the time, even when i didnt get the seat i wanted, in coach. all the anxiety with immigration was for naught. i breezed through very friendly immigration officers both in the u.s. and canada. it was a good, uneventful trip.
it all seems so silly now. but it was so real then. even to the last minute, i was ready to just back out of it. but the ordeal again reminded me of how "little my faith is". that letting go and letting God is still so hard to do. and then again, i am reminded that i should. because He always prevails.