checking his email on the way to work, he almost stopped the car and hollered when he saw jacques' letter!
"hi matthew. im doing better now. thanks for the prayers. i really appreciate your concern and it made me fall for you more. im still weak, just woke up from a long sleep. my body still aches, got bruises all over. but im glad im alive. and so are my companions. dont worry about me. im going to be fine. my folks arrived to take care of me. im so sorry we couldnt meet, i couldnt be there yet. but the moment my strength returns, ill re-book my flight. take care always, jacques"
overjoyed, he went to work that day, finally seeing the gloom disappear. he is back to imagining how it will be when he'll finally meet him. and the daydreams started coming back, too.
for some crazy reason, matthew has such vivid daydreams of life with jacques. crazy because they havent even met in person. there's that scene imagined in the condo, or walking in greenbelt, or taking that flight to paris. or feeding jacques' fish in his condo as jacques prepares lunch. or meeting his parents for the first time. because of the few pics in facebook, he has pieced together this 3D image of jacque with such clarity. and those daydreams sustain him.
but from time to time, he gets reminded that all this remains an electronic relationship, still totally online. yes, there have been a few phone calls, which he cherishes. but a part of him remains a cynic, a healthy stance to take some people might think.
but no matter, the dream is good. and it seems so real to him.
hatinggabi, gising pa't naghihintay
di maidlip at nagbibilang ng tala
sa karamihan nito'y mayroon isang natatangi
at tuwing tatanawi'y mukha mo ang nasasa-isip
ewan ko ba. bakit ka nagpakita pa sa panaginip.
kahit mamasdan ka sa twina
at kahit na di na gumising pa
wag lang malayo sa piling mo
iniibig kahit ika'y panaginip lang.
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