R. Martin D. Asturias The murder of my beloved sister 2 years ago, my framed up that cost me more than 1M, the death of my father, all contributes to my deep pain and lost of zeal for life. Now the one person that you love and trusted can just do this simply cos he knows I have no more place to go after I left Manila. Now that I am forced out... I will go. Again, SORRY AND THANK YOU TO THOSE WHO LOVE AND BELIEVED IN ME.on Friday
gruesome real-time reality of cyberspace.
cc met r martin about 15yrs back, a young, attractive and very drunk hunk in a defunct bar in annapolis, greenhills. cc used to frequent that place, and so did a lot of people. r martin and his friend joined cc and his inuman-mates. cc took r martin home that night, to his condo in makati as he was totally drunk. as horny as cc was, and as attractive r martin was, cc didnt take advantage. and for that r martin respected cc.
that became the start of a friendship. nothing too close. enough flirtation here and there. but never consummated. they would chat if they do see each other. cc even brokered a relationship between r martin and his best friend.
it was always a pleasant surprise for cc to see r martin, whether in malate, or in the gym, or in the mall. because r martin always had nice things to say.
then there was no communication anymore, up till facebook came along. updates on each other's lives were limited to comments and small messages.
until cc came across this gruesome wall message. and the messages and the buzz became loud and very clear. r martin has passed away, and it seemed he took his own life. a day away from his birthday.
cc remains in shock. and even repulsed at the way cyberspace has actually allowed this to unfold with nobody being able to help or intervene.
we are all passive witnesses to both joys and sorrows. to life and this time, to death.
may you rest in peace, r martin.
9 comments:
oh my. my condolences to your dear friend.
This might hurt, it's not safe
But I know that I've gotta make a change
I don't care if I break,
At least I'll be feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of life
I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
No regrets, not this time
I'm gonna let my heart defeat my mind
Let Your love make me whole
I think I'm finally feeling something
'Cause just okay is not enough
Help me fight through the nothingness of this life
'Cause I don't wanna go through the motions
I don't wanna go one more day
without Your all consuming passion inside of me
I don't wanna spend my whole life asking,
"What if I had given everything,
instead of going through the motions?"
'twas indeed a sunday shocker.
Finally, an entry that still does not have any comments! I would like to be the first to leave one he he.
1. I came across your blog about five days ago but I really don't remember how. I was looking for porn I guess and voilà.
2. The first entry I read was about how you met partner.I thought it was just posted the day before today, or two days before that day (gulo), ayun pala two years ago pa. thus:
3. I bactracked reading all your blog entries one by one. And the most tedious part is I had to begin from the latest down to the oldest entry because I am using an iPod touch. Which is crazy!
4. And which also means that I am writing this bulleted comment via tap screen which takes ages to accomplish and hits a mark of 90 percent error rate ha ha.
5. I love your blog. First time I got this hooked over a blog site/blogger. A new fan is born. Thank you!
P.S.
What kind of music do you listen to? :-)
This is so sad.
I heard the news that Martin died last Saturday.
Then I've heard of a story last night, about someone close to our circle who committed a suicide.
I didn't know these two stories point to the same guy.
Martin used to play badminton with us years back. He's very competitive.
This is still a shock to me and my friends.
When I left for Australia, 10 years ago, depression was underdiagnosed in the the Philippines. There is so much stigma associated with mental health. This is sad. I guess nothing has changed.
Too bad, millions of people will really give up anything just to have another day added in their lives - people who are terminally ill - yet sadly, because of deeply rooted emptiness in life, there are also many who will just easily take it away.
Hi, just came across your blog. I was looking for this guy Martin who had a suicide on the net then i came across your blog...sad though that this guy had ended his life this way...but at least it led me to your blog. Bookmark ko na ha.hehe.davez
i believe he doesnt even have family around. i ask that a short prayer for his soul be offered, people. thanks.
thanks for the comments, 3g. i didnt know that the site is tagged with porn. lol. yes, those were dated entries. now totally single. and for the effort to backtrack, THANK YOU. wow. i hope you had fun reading in an ipod touch screen.
thank you for loving/liking the blog. i love piano music. that's the music i actually look for and collect. but otherwise, dance, pop is good for me, too.
hey H-less Cris. i never got to play badminton with him but i could guess he really was quite competitive.
true, quent. even though there is progress in the recognition/detection of mental wellbeing.
we never really know how good we have it until we lose or we encounter someone who wants what we have really bad.
thanks, davez. i do hope i could sustain the interest in you!
Post a Comment