life of quiet desperation

i finally woke up.
it was a beautiful dream... a dream that lasted
for more than two months.
i didnt realize how desperation was building up inside of me.
until i read my blogposts leading up to
the that time when he came into my cyberlife.
alone for more than a year and a half by that time
i was convincing myself that i was good
that i was good alone
but a part of me kept on hanging on to dear hope
and that part was becoming desperate
the timing was perfect, impeccable
he, all one's and zero's, gave me a vision
of a beautiful life together
of interest in me and my life
there were signs that i should have read
bells and whistles at different points
but i didnt care
and so it ends
abrupt as it may seem
i wake up, jolted back into reality
that i remain alone
the flame remains burning
but it will slowly die
it will not be blown off
it will just run out of precious air
another drawer, another file folder
appended, categorized, labeled
filed and archived
in the hollow cavern of my heart