the one who got away

January 24 at 2:00am

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Just wondering if you are the CC I used to hang out with in Manila like 15 years ago... Are you from UP? I am Robbie. Let me know either way, I am in the process of locating my old friends..

I was so surprised to read this message in my social networking site inbox. Wow. Robbie? i couldn't believe it.

I have two exes whom I would label as 'the one who got away.' Robbie is one of them. we had a brief but intense relationship so many years back. I was about 23yo then, he was about a year younger.

i cant remember how we actually met. must have been a referral. he was a contradiction of sorts. on the outside, he looked like a punk. curly hair that he would grow long. he was faithful to the punk-rock 80's look, even on a casual day. he wasn't so handsome but i found his slanted-downward eyes cute and his 'pico-de-loro' nose adorable.

but he overwhelmed me with his intelligence and creativity. he spoke four languages, including spanish and bahasa. he played all musical instruments and composed songs, beautiful melodies.

yet all he wanted was to be known as a punk rocker. he didnt even pay much attention to trying to get work.

we would argue about that, and argue passionately. because i was just starting my career then. and all i could think about was how to start earning big so i could do what i want.

but he had such a beautiful, sensitive side. he would bring me to a conservatory of music, to visit friends, malaysian seminarians who were studying music. and on the piano, he would play songs he composed. and one song he composed for me. i still keep the hand-written lyrics of that song. i would melt just listening to him and he would just look into my eyes, with so much soul.

i broke his heart when i hooked up with a friend of his (yes, i was that despicable). it just so happened that his friend was drop-dead gorgeous. and that young age, i was blown over. he felt betrayed but i never felt that he hated me. that was the end of that (a less-than-a-year affair).

we tried to keep in touch a few years after. and he would introduce me to his new paramour, as i introduce mine. i'd be flattered when he'd mention that his new love was just like me, in many ways.

many, many years after, i came to realize how valuable he was to me. and how wonderful that short affair was.

oh wow. hey rob. yes, its me. it's actually more like 20 yrs ago when we used to hang out. i still vividly recall those times we used to hang out. i couldnt believe this, seriously. do you still compose? and i see you are in the travel industry now. all those languages you know must come in handy.

i've always wondered what happened to you. thank you for locating me and id really like to be in touch from now on, rob. please tell me more about yourself. do take care.