making love, the movie

it was probably one of the first major films to deal with homosexuality as the central theme. I was in 4th yr high school when i watched it with my friends at Quad. I remember being so moved by the story, not that it's such a great story nor movie. I just felt that Making Love was the first film that talked to me directly about the feelings that have been welling up inside me. And with that film, i first glimpsed the discreet gay male lifestyle - which we used to call 'macho gay'. i instinctively knew that this was the lifestyle for me. although i had my effeminate ways growing up, i never fully identified with the overtly effeminate homosexual, which was the stereotype. for some reason, i didnt feel like a 'woman trapped in a man's body'. i definitely didnt want to see myself in make-up or in women's clothes. watching harry hamlin as the beefy, macho homosexual in a room full of other gays like him was like seeing HOME for the first time.

the movie itself has a very simple story line. young, cute married doctor discovers his latent homosexuality with hunky patient, a discreet but out gay writer. with him, doctor experiences m2m sex for the first time. he wants a relationship but hunky gay writer is not into relationships. meanwhile, his marriage crumbles on the weight of the discovery. poor unsuspecting wife flips out. she wants him back but he has made up his mind to be true to himself.

fast forward to a time when he has finally found a lover and he meets ex-wife again, also happily married with a kid this time. she looks like she still carries the torch but he definitely is happier about himself.

it was a major motion picture then (as far as i was concerned). and even their kiss seemed to be shot from afar, not made to look too intimate. but it was definitely an achievement then. more particularly to young gays like me, still discovering their identities.

i still have very vivid memories of certain scenes: the 'counseling' style of presenting the wife and the lover, the kiss, the bar scene, etc. and i remain so grateful to the film for making me realize that there is a lifestyle not necessarily confined to make-up, long hair and beauty pageants.