I've been taking voice lessons for 9 months, I think. I'd like to think I have improved tremendously since the start. I have slowly 'unlearned' bad habits and have started to be more natural as I sing the high notes.
I have performed in front of an audience (office mates) for a few times. They have commented positively. And they encourage me to sing more. Teacher tells me to grab every opportunity to sing for people. Because that's the only way I could learn. Yet I remain shy. I can't 'volunteer' myself to 'entertain.' I still feel unworthy.
I'd like to think that my first pieces are quite challenging - Nella Fantasia, Con Te Partiro, Be My Love, O Sole Mio. But lately, I have been trying to push myself to reach higher and higher notes.
Teacher encourages me (at least I think he does). He tells me that I can actually reach those notes, that it seems to be not outside my range. So he practices me, coaches me on how to properly 'support' the voice as it aims high.
So I have taken to learning Nessun Dorma, Ave Maria (Bach/Gounod) - Bocelli's version. Yet I struggle. So much effort. I fail to reach the notes or sustain them. Pumipiyok ako. Teacher tells me it is only because I don't support properly. And besides, those are really difficult pieces. It takes much to learn to sing properly.
Over supper, my dad commented "Isn't your Teacher pushing you too much? Couldn't he hear you can't reach the notes?" He said it sincerely, with concern. Yet the words stung me. They are still ringing in my ears.
"Dad, I have to. That's the only way I could learn. I need to keep on stretching my limits."
Hijo, pumipiyok ka na. Ouch.
Am I really crazy trying to push myself where I cannot go anymore? Is it trying to squeeze blood from a turnip?
I reason that when I was starting, I was also having difficulty reaching the notes of my first pieces. Yet now, I can confidently sing them. Isn't it really just a matter of time and practice on my part? Or should I really just give up on those and stick to the 'safe songs'?
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